The Conscious Womb
by Darshna Parmar
I never really thought of my organs as conscious, especially my womb. If anything, it caused me so much pain every month, i suppose i despised it! A resentment grew unknowingly and through the course of time i tried to control it by taking contraceptives to ease the pain, not realising that a silent damage and suppression of my creativity was taking place. For i had no medical knowledge and the doctor was being practical.I would have succumbed to any solution then…In my eyes men had it easier, no periods let alone PMS.
Although i was born into the tradition of Hinduism, where the divine feminine is worshiped beautifully and spent many years dancing around a metaphoric womb at the Navaratri festival every Autumn. It had obviously got lost in translation,because one i didn’t get it and two i wasn’t told i was a personification of the goddess in her many attributes!
My love is my devotion to the image i like to perceive as god, however it was still in separation. I had heard that god resides in you as you, but couldn’t quite understand why i was praying to a separate being if it was me. My spiritual awakening and the practice of yoga particularly meditation, opened and expanded my awareness and with the tools from Ayurveda i managed to heal myself from Breast cancer, caused by the silent damage and my consciousness. As i connected more to my core self, i met my feminine half which i had forgotten about and started to nourish, love and embrace it. Healing the wounds of ancestors past that had buried themselves in my tissues as DNA and past life grief, disguised as memory playing out through my unconscious mind, into my physical being.
The separation of that god was my own body, mind and spirit. As it unified i became one with myself and the universe…that oneness of bliss a euphoric moment which words cannot describe. I felt it, i cried!
I resided in every cell and organ. My creativity lies in the conscious awareness of my ovaries and is nourished and flowered in my womb.
What a beautiful metaphor for every aspect of my life!